Soooo tired yet I cant sleep. At least I have tried to sleep. I guess thats what you get for napping all day on your day off. Just had a glass of red wine, hoping that will coax me into dream land. Had an interesting evening. The bf and I havent had sex in almost 2 months. So finally tonight we do and he well how do I put this delicatly, releases inside of me. Now I am not on birth control nor did we use a condome. Wise huh. he knows this too. the thing about is is I just dont know if I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I also just applied for a job in Chicago. It would be a great opportunity for me to make more money and regain some independence. A baby would surely mess that up. then I look on facebook and see all of the pictures of friends my age having babies and my heart just melts and I can feel tears streaming down my face. That is truly what I want, but right now? I will probably go get the plan b rx tomorrow. what choice do i have. the timing is not right but will it ever be. and is he the right guy to be the father of my children and the man I spend the rest of my life with.